One Year Drinking With My Brother

embarrassingAs announced, we’re celebrating a year’s worth of posts by putting aside our usual practice to reflect on all the lessons we’ve learned as not-so-savvy cocktailians:


One of the many benefits of growing up in a large family are the things you learn from your siblings. Some are more important than others, but all add to who you are. David and I are the fourth and fifth children, respectively, of five in our family. As the two youngest we shared rooms, seats next to each other in cars, places at the table and spots on couches. More than that we shared a lot of time with each other, and even today I hear myself using expressions that I know come directly from him. One of my absolute favorites is and has been the description of someone as “a master of the startlingly obvious.” And that is what I feel like I am with my observations and lessons gleaned from our first year of this blog. That won’t stop me from sharing my thoughts though.

1. A close observer/reader should know that fresh ingredients and homemade mixers are the key to better drinks. To make cocktails I have juiced lemons, limes, oranges, grapefruits, pomegranates, and kumquats. Simple syrups have been created from sugar, brown sugar, demerara, sorghum, maple syrup and honey. Those syrups have been flavored with herbs, spices, nuts and more fruit. Store-bought sweet and sour, grenadine and orgeat? Why, when you make your own during the week. The end result may take longer, but the difference is well worth it.

2. It is often repeated in our weekly write up, but prior to this blog, beer and wine were pretty much the extent of drinks I enjoyed. I always assumed, however, that I knew the basics of liquors and the drinks made with them. Wrong, very wrong. Gin might be the best example of a liquor with incredible variation and types, so much so that using the right one in a drink can drastically improve the taste. Then there are the liquors that I never knew existed (a few of which I could still get by without knowing Mr. Campari) like aquavit, cachaça, and pisco. The stories of these unique distillations is in itself a lesson in history and culture. Every time I think we are reaching some level of understanding and knowledge, there is another one that appears and begs to be used. I hope David is ready for Cynar because it, and a pronunciation guide, will make an appearance soon.

3. We compared notes this week and the next lesson is one that overlaps for us—taste. There have been more drinks that we have both enjoyed, and a few where we both did not, than there has been disagreement. Next week we will get a better idea of that when we choose our hits and misses, but, before that, there are some generalizations to be drawn. The classic cocktail, in my mind, is the standard sour. Liquor, sweetener and sour element are the basics of that drink. Almost any mix that has followed that simple idea has met my approval. I especially like those with interesting sweeteners like maple, or odd sours like grapefruit. There are other categories of drinks besides the sour, such as those with effervescence from sparkling wine or club soda, that also stand out but in a pinch I fall back on the sour.

4. Another general rule of taste is the use of bitters. It is an odd ingredient in most drinks because, to my taste, it never stands out. In fact you can rarely identify that one has been added, but, like salt, it seems to intensify and improve the other parts of the drink. The drinks that are all liquor, bitter elements and actual bitters have not been my favorite, but take a simple drink like bourbon and ginger then add some Angostura and you can taste a transformation.

5. My final lesson is one that I did not really learn so much as re-learn. Drinking is a social experience. The first and most obvious part of that is the very basis of this blog. David and I started this as a way to interact more, even if it was a virtual interaction. Along the way, my wife has joined me in almost every weekly tasting, as David’s wife has in his. Our children are adults so they not only try some of the drinks, but are great sources for suggestions. There have been tailgates, family visits, happy hours, celebrations and random get-togethers with friends and neighbors. It has reached the point that even as the specific drinks escape memory, the events do not. Of course there is also the virtual interaction with readers who comment on-line, or through text and e-mail. It is a rare week when I do not receive some feedback, suggestion or drink recipe in some form or another. Those of you who keep sending pictures and menu snippets, and you know who you are, keep sending them and I will keep looking for edible glitter.


I few weeks ago, when we were thinking about ways to celebrate our 52nd post on this blog Jonathan speculated how long we’d keep it up, then asked, “Until we’re famous?” That sounds good to me, mostly because we aren’t famous yet and therefore must continue. This enterprise is too much fun to give up. Beside the benefit Jonathan has mentioned—our increased communication—a weekly cocktail gives me something to look forward to, and, yes, I’m learning. Sure it’s not the same as learning differential equations, but growth is growth. Don’t judge. Though I’m not yet a savvy cocktailian, I’m certainly savvier. Thinking about the lessons of the year, many occurred to me, and as Jonathan said, most won’t be surprising. Still they’re important… just the way this blog is important even if we aren’t famous (yet).

1. Get to know someone. I owe a huge debt of gratitude to all the helpful and friendly people who answer my every silly question about the difference between Cachaça and Rum and Rhum and Rum. Echoing Jonathan, this blog teaches me how much there is to know, but it also teaches me how many patient, generous, and funny teachers are out there. I don’t get a “Norm!” when I visit my local upscale grocery, but I do get, “What’s the cocktail this week?” and some thorough and thoughtful advice.

2. The alcohol isn’t everything but it’s something. Let me say for the record that inebriation isn’t a good hobby, but Jonathan is right, part of the joy of cocktails is that they announce an intention to relax and a desire to put aside much too crowded and busy lives to share relaxation with others. Were my brother and I involved in a remote popsicle club, I’m sure that’d be fun too, but, in moderation, spirits are much more fun.

3. De gustibus non est disputandum: I’ve memorized few Latin phrases, but I know that one. It means, “There’s no disputing about matters of taste.” Week to week, I’m struck by how differently people react to cocktails. Just when I think no one could possibly stomach an Aviation, my wife asks for another. Human organisms must experience taste (literal and figurative) in so many different ways. And, not to be too philosophical, but what’s worth celebrating more than that?

4. On a related note, smell matters, and not just smell but all the senses matter. I’ve discovered every sense is critical to a cocktail—its look and its taste and its smell and its “mouth feel.” Okay, so maybe its sound doesn’t matter so much, but really enjoying a cocktail requires engaging your whole sensory self. Maybe, in fact, that’s the secret, pausing long enough to appreciate the extraordinary apparatus with which we’re blessed.

5. Don’t overcomplicate the complications. A few times during this journey—okay, more than a few—I’ve thought “Why all the steps?” Yet trouble is part of the investment you make in the result. Although I worry sometimes about all the hoops I make Jonathan leap through—particularly in the spirit-backward state that is North Carolina—anything wonderful is worth working for. I have nothing against simple and elegant cocktails, but as in many matters, the journey endows the destination with special meaning.

Next Week:

Jonathan and I will be examining the hits and misses we’ve encountered this year. It’s not too late to let us know what you think!

6 thoughts on “One Year Drinking With My Brother

  1. Don’t underestimate how famous you’ve already become! When I search “A Drink With My Brother” on Google, I no longer have to weed through websites meant to help people cope with alcoholic siblings because the blog is now the top link available.

    I’m not sure if this is the forum to share my favorite drink or if I should wait until cocktailians have spoken, but I’ll get the ball rolling in the comment section while I have the chance. Honestly my main thought doesn’t differ from the last point my dad(Jonathan) made. I distinctly remember the events that went along with each cocktail much more than the taste. The few times I joined in on the shopping trips, assisted in the mad scientist constructions, or served as a guinea pig stick out much more than the tastes of obscure, lukewarm liquor served to me in stainless steel measuring cups(thankfully). Every drink shared at a Saturday football tailgate or family gathering blends together because the faces of friends and family members remain in the forefront.

    My nomination for biggest hit, or at least the week I enjoyed the most, was the mint julep. I finally convinced my friends at school to participate in the drink of the week because cheap bourbon somehow always finds its way into a college senior’s budget. While I loved the taste and ease of assembly, the ice melting on pace in the pre-summer warmth of late afternoon in May, the true joy came from knowing that, at post time, Uncle David and my dad along with everyone across the country who follows the blog or loves the traditional aspect of the Derby, also had the same drink in hand as part of an extended network cocktail club.

    I applaud the last year of blogging and raise a glass to the coming years of drinks that bring even more friends and family closer together.


    Ps Wow, kinda got a little long on the comment there. I guess this can serve as that guest blog I always said I would try to write.

  2. Has it ONLY been a year of cocktails? We have incorporated this cocktail event in a variety of settings and occasions over the past year. From a visit to San Antonio, football games, beach trips, lake weekends, college graduations to gatherings on the back patio. I have searched for the perfect props for the photo shoot, wandered around a variety of liquor stores and shopped for the ideal coupe. My review of the year long cocktail adventure is: it has been AWESOME!

    I have been the beneficiary of so many different concoctions–some that I have enjoyed immensely and even requested another and some that have gone down the kitchen sink drain (sorry, boys). Born and bred in the South, I was weaned on sweet tea. As a result, I tend to enjoy sweeter beverages more than bitter ones. My favorites typically include fresh fruit juices, a simple syrup and some variety of alcohol.

    There is no denying that ALL of the cocktails have been interesting, many have been surprising and several have become favorites. Our friends and family have enjoyed being a part of this process and almost always ask Jonathan what the drink of the week is this week. Sharing the drinks has been the best part of the experience. I look forward to many new cocktail events in the second year of “A Drink With My Brother.”

    Thanks for the effort that you have put into this experience for us all, Jonathan and David!

    Hits: Libertea, Ultimate Margarita, French 75, Bourbon Cider

    Misses: Aviation, Greenback, Cinquecento

  3. Great year in review guys! I only started following a couple of months ago, but I really look forward to your posts each week. I was much in the same boat where we typically only drank wine, beer and the occasional basic mixed drink. I got sick of the standards and started looking for more creative and quality drinks. The #1 lesson I’ve learned so far is that quality ingredients make all the difference (I must have squeezed 1000 limes this summer!) It requires some extra planning, but you’re right, it really makes all the difference. And I’ll save my fave for your hits and misses post 🙂

    • One of the highlights of my year was receiving a good device for juicing citrus! Everyone says you can choose less fancy ingredients for cocktails, but my experience tells me that—while that might be somewhat true of spirits—it’s certainly noticeable when you include something special.

      Thanks so much for following our blog. We love hearing from you.

      • I’m doing it by hand too, but what I’d been using was much too big and lacked measurement marks on the side. Now I have one with interchangeable parts, one for limes and one for lemons. I don’t know where it came from—it was a gift from my daughter—but it’s a vast improvement.

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